Once upon a time there was a girl named Nancy.
Nancy loved to hike. In fact, she would spend all her time in the mountains if she could.
Sadly, Nancy had something called a day job, and it often kept her far, far away from the mountains.
When Nancy was finally able to get back to her beloved mountains, a stone’s throw from the mystical land of Las Vegas, she rushed to hike up Cathedral Rock.
This was a mistake because on that day, Cathedral Rock was too hot!
Learn from Goldilocks, Nancy told herself, let’s skip the “too cold” trail and head straight to the hike that’s “just right”. So she did.
And Bristlecone Trail was just right. Complete with magical horses, shade and quiet.
As much as she loved hiking, Nancy wanted to try new things. But what type of activity, she wondered, can I participate in without melting in the 118F desert heat?
Why, kayaking of course!
And despite never having been in a kayak before, Nancy threw caution to the wind and took her first paddle on one of the biggest waterways in the United States, the Colorado River.
With steely determination, she willed herself to stay upright and not tip that kayak over.
I can do this, she told herself. And she did, for over 2 hours!
Unfortunately, Nancy had to focus on her day job again. This meant driving to Orange County, in California, for some business meetings.
Four long hours later, Nancy had arrived at Newport Beach, where she immediately threw off her shoes and took a nice long beach walk. She was so happy to see the ocean and feel the crunch of the wet sand between her toes that she forgot to snap a single picture.
She did work up an appetite though, so straight to a restaurant she went. The tapas were lovely, and small enough to warrant dessert.
After her business meetings, Nancy decided to take a day off from her day job and take a detour through Palm Springs.
Palm Springs held many delights that warmed Nancy’s heart: art galleries, kitchy home furnishings, and one extra special must-have thing…
Yes, a giant, inflatable, rubber ducky.
Nancy knew this rubber ducky needed to move to Toronto to live with her, so she snapped it up right away. At $79.99, it was a steal, she told herself.
After a lovely day in Palm Springs, it was straight back to her Las Vegas home. Unfortunately, the day job was calling, and this meant having to travel all the way back to her Toronto home.
At first Nancy felt sad. The trip had flown by in the flash of an eye. That was when her trusty sidekick, Mr. Enthusiasm, surprised her with a little bit of Vegas right there in her own backyard.
Nancy was absolutely certain that her neighbours would just LOVE IT, seeing as how they had already commented about how “bright” her outdoor furnishings were.
Once the neon sign and the rubber ducky had both settled in, it was time for Nancy to show that duck who was boss.
Try as she might though, Nancy could not master the mounting and riding of that duck.
Always up for a challenge, she vowed to make this happen.
Duck, I will make you my bitch, Nancy told herself. And the duck.
Then, finally, with her family cheering her on, Nancy owned that duck.
And she lived happily ever after.
Until she had to fly to New Orleans for 6 days of business, that is. But, as Nancy knows all too well, what happens in New Orleans, stays in New Orleans, so you just have to imagine what may or may not have gone on there.