farch: the worst month ever

February + March = Farch.

I hate Farch.

According to the calendar, Farch is only 59 days long, which makes me wonder why it FEELS LIKE 2 YEARS???

Farch is never a happy time for me. Let me count the reasons why…

  • I hate winter.
  • I hate short days (wake up: it’s dark, finish work: it’s dark).
  • I hate the lackΒ of sunlight.
  • I hate bundling 47 layers on my body to head out to my driveway.

This year Farch decided to really fark with me though. Because this year Farch meant travel. Lots and lots and lots of travel.

FarchTravel to the tune of 31 days on the road during Farch.

I was home 28 days and away 31. And I still managed to buy a house – from across an ocean – and 5 hours ahead.

No wonder I’m tired.

And irritable.

And snarky.

And hungry. (Well, I’m not sure my travel schedule explains my perplexing hunger these past few weeks, other than anxious eating. Or self-soothing with comfort foods.)

Upon my return from Atlanta a week ago Friday, I declared a self-imposed travel moratorium. NO TRAVEL UNTIL MID APRIL!!, said I. It helped that Mr. Enthusiasm reminded me that I actually HAD to be here this week to deal with things like the bank and lawyer, etc.

Because, oh yeah, I’M MOVING ON MONDAY.

Excuse me while I drown my sorrows in a bag of corn chips, won’t you?

Fark off, Farch!

Keep moving,

xoxo nancy

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99 thoughts on “farch: the worst month ever

  1. I never thought about grouping February and March into one horrible month, but I like your style. You’re right. It’s awful. All I want to do is hibernate but the rest of the world keeps turning. How you pulled off so much travel and house stuff is beyond me. Gold medal for you Nancy. Best wishes on your move!

  2. I would have to agree that Farch has sucked BIG time. No travel. No buying a house. No dealing with banks. No packing to move. No cold weather. No time zone changes. Lawyer…YIKES!!!…Houston, we have a problem!!! I know your lawyer is no doubt financial but let Mr. Enthusiasm know it is better to let you kill him and bury him under a new patio with his beloved Saab then to even let the thought of “divorce” enter his mind. I hope your weekend has less stress and you are able to soak up some of those really old photons. Like a shark, keep moving….or in the words of Dory…Just keep swimming….

  3. “Fark off, Farch!”—Ha! That says it all. You gave me a good laugh with that one. But sorry you’ve got so much going on. February and March are my least favorite months, too, but at least I spent most of them at home until recently. You must be exhausted. Good thing you only have a little thing like a move ahead of you. That shouldn’t be tiring at all…

    Good luck with everything. Your blogging buds will be thinking of you.

    • Thanks Carrie. I’m in a wee bit of denial about how hard this weekend plus Monday will be. No turning back now though! πŸ™‚ Farking Farch, messing with me right to the very last.

    • We are using professional movers for the first time ever (the past 2 house moves we used family/friends) – so I’m hoping that things go WAY more smoothly with pros involved. πŸ™‚

  4. I thought Farch was going to be a combo of Fart and March, which I quite liked, too! We actually had a lovely March with uncharacteristically warm weather and noticeably longer days – I got to spend lots of time outdoors. That’s probably just irritating to hear though (sorry!) so I’ll just wish you Bon Chance with the move. It’ll all be worth it when you move into your shiny new house!

    • I really shouldn’t be griping too much about the latter part of Farch (i.e. March) as I had 10 days of gorgeous sunny weather in Vegas with 24C – 30C) followed by a few great days in Atlanta in the low 20s C. I just like to whine. πŸ™‚

      And as for moving into a shiny new house, um, not so much. We are leaving a beautiful, shiny, amazing house and moving into a money pit fixer-upper. Good times. πŸ™‚

      • Yeh, I remember walking around our house when we first bought it repeated saying “What on earth were we thinking?” It was a lot of work but we ended up with a gorgeous house. It will all be worth it in the end!

  5. When I lived in Illinois I used to hate March. I’d be so ready for winter to be over. Now that I spend my time in the desert southwest I love March. Spring in the desert is beautiful. I don’t envy all that traveling you’ve been doing AND topping it off with a move…. yikes. This calls for extra chocolate! Not to worry, I’ll eat for you πŸ˜‰

    • I may be rocking back and forth in the fetal position by end of day Monday. Thank heavens for pro movers. Possibly the only thing between me and a prolonged catatonic state. πŸ™‚

  6. But heck – you’ve kept your kick ass sense of humour! So movers beware – they may be doubled over with laughter not back-breaking work!!

    My humble recipe for sanity? Check into a hotel with a massive bathtub (heck jaccuzzi even better). Open a good bottle of wine and soak!! Plus forgive all snack attacks in the interim!

    Looking forward to pics of the new abode and good luck surviving the chaos!

  7. To sum it up Nancy, I really don’t know how you are holding it together. I would be a drooling mess curled up in the corner by now!
    I share your feeling about farking Farch though. Spring can’t come soon enough.

    Good luck over the next 3 days!! Sending positive energy your way πŸ™‚

    • Thank you kindly, my dear. I’ll take any and all positive vibes and good juju. Speaking of which… I need to find a sage smudge stick to smoke out the bad juju from the new house. GAH one more thning to do.

  8. what about Marbruary?
    To be fair, starting around 20 December, the days start getting longer. They shorten again come ~20 August. It’s the cold that makes winter suck.
    Congrats on the house!

    • Lordy, I would welcome hot flashes and all the other fun elements of menopause. BECAUSE ON TOP OF EVERYTHING ELSE, IT’S ALSO THAT TIME OF THE MONTH. GAH. I’m almost 50 damn years old, let it go, body. Just let it go. Nooooooo, like goddamned clockwork every 27 days. FML.

      • Sorry about the FML, but thanks for a hearty laugh. I’ve always freely admitted that women get the lousy end of the gender business. I’m sure what I call mental-pause will descend at an opportune time. Peace!

  9. At last – someone has given us the perfect words to describe this horrible time of year. Farking Farch will now be used not only in my home, but in homes across the world. Your blog has made history!
    Good luck on your move πŸ™‚

  10. I don’t blame you one bit for the exhaustion you must be feeling, Nancy. Not only are you in the middle of all the chaos, but you don’t really have a place to rest your head at night that feels like home. Chronic stress. It’s what we all seem to be handling these days, but certainly not thriving on.
    Tomorrow’s a big day. I have no doubt it will be exciting and adventurous. Walking into your beautiful new house. I hope it feels like a welcome home hug.

    • Oh Shelley, I wish! Tomorrow we move into a massive fixer upper. The fun has only just begun for me. πŸ™‚ On the plus side, I get to wield a sledgehammer again!

  11. I know this is not a funny post but its still funny…Farch. lol! You have a crazy busy schedule and yet still manage to blog..I’m impressed! I miss the blogging world..been a while for me. Good luck with your move and all of your travels!! xo

    • Thanks Kerry. I’m not exactly sure how I’ve managed to keep all the balls in the air. I suspect I come here for a wee bit of escape from the madness. Hope your new business is booming!

      • So far so good! Crossing fingers for continued success. I feel the urge to share coming back…teacher training is finished in May, so I may be back after that πŸ™‚

  12. You have been extremely busy – and I’d love to give the platitude that it will get better, but really? Right now it’s just your life – but at least there is some sunshine happening πŸ™‚ Have fun and be safe during the move!

  13. Farch! That is just a perfect word to describe the two months and also implies the malaise that comes with short days and a lousy climate! I can’t believe how busy you were throughout Farch! You are amazing, Nancy. I hope that April opens up to a renewed spirit of optimism, and probably some good old fashioned rest. You can still keep moving, but with a different purpose. πŸ™‚

  14. Nancy, I am so behind, I hope this comment finds you already MOVED! πŸ™‚

    Seriously, I hope it went well and that the end of Farch brings you some sun, warmth and peace!

  15. Oh, sorry you’re sick Nancy. The boxes (most anyway) can wait, just take care of yourself…I’m sure you’ve found the bed, mattress and some bedding go to with it. It’ll just get better from here. Hugz!

  16. Hahaha Farch – I love it! Congrats on your new house – hooray!
    I can’t believe you were in Atlanta – I live there – next time we much get together! After the no-travel party is over : )

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